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A recent study published in Social Psychological and Personality Science suggests that people with social anxiety experience more meaningful and playful social interactions when communicating through digital channels or in small groups. The findings provide evidence that adjusting the social environment to feel more controllable tends to help socially anxious individuals get the most out of their daily social exchanges.
Social interactions play a central part in human happiness and a sense of belonging. The benefits of these connections are not felt equally by everyone. People who experience trait social anxiety often feel intense fear or discomfort in social situations, whether those situations are real or just imagined.
Socially anxious people tend to worry about being judged, sounding foolish, or being ignored by others. Because of these fears, they can find everyday conversations incredibly draining rather than uplifting. The mental weight of constantly monitoring themselves and looking out for negative reactions takes a significant toll.
Past research has mostly focused on how social interactions demand energy from these individuals in a general sense. The authors of the new study wanted to understand if specific situations might change how socially anxious people react to socializing.
“We were interested in understanding why social interactions don’t benefit everyone equally. While social connection is generally linked to well-being, people differ widely in how they experience everyday interactions, especially those with higher social anxiety. They are normally assumed to experience their interactions with difficulties, expending more energy and achieving lower benefits,” said study author Aurelio Fernández, a postdoctoral researcher at the Institute for Culture and Society at the University of Navarra.
“We wanted to move beyond the idea that ‘more socializing is always better’ and instead examine when and under what conditions interactions are most beneficial, particularly for socially anxious individuals. Our idea was to identify a kind of ‘comfort zone’ in which they can socially thrive. This is particularly important because social anxiety is a psychological disposition rather than a personality trait, so positive social experiences can play a key role in shaping the future role of anxiety.”
The scientists recruited 157 American adults between the ages of 18 and 71. Women made up about 66 percent of the participants in the sample. At the start of the study, participants filled out a standard questionnaire to measure their baseline levels of trait social anxiety. The researchers also used a method called experience sampling, which involves asking people to report on their thoughts and feelings in real time throughout their normal daily routines.
This approach minimizes memory errors because participants do not have to look back and guess how they felt days ago. Over the course of two weeks, participants received up to six brief surveys a day on their smartphones. These surveys triggered at random times within set intervals based on when the participants normally woke up and went to sleep. This extensive tracking generated a massive collection of data, capturing the exact details of 10,547 unique social interactions.
In the daily surveys, participants answered questions about their most recent social interaction. They rated the interaction’s quality on a scale from one to five based on three specific dimensions: pleasantness, playfulness, and meaningfulness. Participants also rated their current energy levels on a similar five-point scale. This allowed the researchers to track how different interactions affected their overall vitality in the real world.
The surveys also asked participants to describe the exact context of each interaction. They reported the communication channel, noting whether the exchange happened face-to-face or through a mediated format like a phone call, video chat, or text message.
Participants also recorded the size of the group, which the researchers categorized as either small, meaning fewer than four other people, or large. Finally, they indicated how often they interacted with these specific people to track familiarity.
The researchers found that higher-quality interactions were consistently associated with increased momentary energy across the board. When participants reported that a conversation was particularly pleasant, playful, or meaningful, they also tended to report feeling more energized right afterward. This provides evidence that positive social exchanges can actually restore a person’s energy levels in the moment.
At the same time, social anxiety was generally linked to lower overall energy. Individuals who scored higher in trait social anxiety tended to report having less energy during their daily lives on average.
But when the researchers looked closely at the quality of the interactions, they noticed something different. The specific social context played a major role in shaping the daily experience.
The data suggests that the negative impact of social anxiety on playfulness is notably weaker in small groups compared to large ones. In settings with fewer than four other people, socially anxious individuals reported much more playful and relaxed interactions. Smaller groups likely feel less intimidating for these individuals. There are fewer social cues to track and fewer opportunities for perceived judgment.
The scientists also observed that mediated communication channels helped buffer the effects of social anxiety. When interacting through text messages or phone calls instead of face-to-face, socially anxious people reported having more meaningful conversations.
“One interesting finding was that digitally mediated interactions were not necessarily worse than face-to-face ones,” Fernández told PsyPost. “In some cases, they were actually more beneficial for socially anxious individuals. This challenges the common assumption that in-person interaction is always the ‘gold standard.'”
Digital channels offer a layer of distance and control, allowing individuals to process information and respond at their own pace. This likely eases the intense pressure of immediate, in-person social cues.
Familiarity did not seem to change how socially anxious individuals experienced their interactions. Whether participants were talking to someone they saw daily or someone they rarely interacted with, their levels of anxiety and energy remained relatively consistent.
“A second finding that surprised me is that we didn’t find that socially anxious individuals experience better interactions with more familiar people,” Fernández said. “I think that a reason behind this finding is that some of the most challenging interactions may occur with people they see occasionally — those who are neither strangers nor very familiar. These relationships may lack the comfort needed to feel at ease, while still involving some degree of social pressure. This is an idea I would like to explore further in future research.”
“A key takeaway is that the quality and context of social interactions matter more than simply how often we socialize. What really matters is the fit between the individual and the interaction (quality/energy, context). Not everyone experiences all interactions in the same way.”
“Our findings suggest that people gain the most of their social interactions if they interact in the ways that fits better their psychological/social needs,” Fernández explained. “For people with higher social anxiety, interactions can be more rewarding when they occur in smaller groups or through digital channels that offer more control. In other words, it’s not about avoiding social interaction, but about finding the right fit between the person and the situation.”
As with all research, there are a few caveats to consider. The scientists measured familiarity based purely on how often people interacted, which does not capture the actual emotional safety of a relationship. For example, a person might interact with a strict boss every day but still feel highly anxious around them.
Another limitation involves the specific measurement of energy. The daily surveys asked participants to rate their overall energy, but they did not distinguish between physical, mental, or emotional energy. Future research could use more specific definitions. This would help reveal exactly which type of energy is gained or lost during different kinds of social interactions.
“We are interested in better understanding how daily social experiences accumulate over time to shape well-being and mental health,” Fernández said. “In line with this article, we want to explore individual differences in the daily social behavior of individuals.”
“Next steps are exploring more situational conditions that help socially anxious individuals to socially thrive, as well as exploring how they behave when they are not interacting but spending time alone, in solitude. This can be quite important as social interactions might particularly echo within solitude moments for socially anxious individuals. Ultimately, we hope to inform interventions that help people navigate their social lives in ways that better match their individual needs.”
“One broader implication is that social life is highly personalized,” Fernández added. “Rather than prescribing a one-size-fits-all approach to socializing, our findings suggest that well-being depends on aligning social environments with individual preferences and characteristics. This perspective may be especially useful for rethinking how we approach social anxiety in everyday life.”
The study, “The Right Fit: When Socially Anxious Individuals Gain the Most From Social Interactions,” was authored by Aurelio Fernández, Yifei Lu, William J. Chopik, Gabriella M. Harari, Lisa Rhee, and Joseph B. Bayer.
