An analysis of the Relationship Dynamics and Social Life study data found that women were more likely to experience violence from their intimate partners at the time the partner was having another sexual partner. This was the case both in situations where the couple did not have an explicit agreement about monogamy and when they had an agreement to be monogamous (that the partner broke). The probability that the relationship will be dissolved was higher after these events. The paper was published in the Journal of Marriage and Family.
Intimate relationships are an important part of adolescence and early adulthood. They help young people develop skills that can shape their relationships later in life. Yet young relationships do not always provide positive experiences. Conflict, controlling behavior, violence, and infidelity can all occur during this period. Therefore, learning to end an unhealthy relationship may be just as important a developmental task as learning how to form and maintain one.
People generally decide whether to remain with a partner by weighing what they gain from the relationship against its emotional and practical costs. Negative experiences can increase those costs, reduce relationship satisfaction, and make being single or finding another partner seem more attractive.
However, not every harmful experience has the same meaning or the same likelihood of bringing a relationship to an end. Physical aggression, psychological abuse, threats, and controlling behavior can overlap, making it difficult to separate their individual effects on a relationship. Infidelity can be particularly destabilizing because it represents a clear violation of an explicit expectation of monogamy and introduces another person into the relationship.
Study authors Jennifer S. Barber and Yasamin Kusunoki examined how intimate partner violence and non-monogamy (having more than one partner at the same time) co-occur and shape the probability of relationship dissolution. They differentiate between two types of non-monogamy – ambiguous-consent non-monogamy and non-consensual non-monogamy.
Ambiguous-consent non-monogamy is a situation where a person has concurrent sexual partners without an explicit agreement about monogamy or non-monogamy. Non-consensual non-monogamy represents a situation where a person has additional sexual partners while in a committed monogamous relationship (this is also called cheating). Study authors expected that intimate partner violence and these two types of non-monogamy will tend to co-occur in relationships and that they increase the probability of subsequent relationship dissolution.
They analyzed data from the Relationship Dynamics and Social Life (RDSL) study. This study involved 1003 young women who were 18-19 years old at the start of the study, drawn from a diverse Michigan county. 992 of them agreed to participate in the longitudinal part of the study. The study followed these women for 2.5 years, to 20-22.5 years of age. It was focused on young pregnancies. Participants were sampled randomly using a database of all driver’s license holders and personal ID card holders for that county. 84% of women selected for participation in this way agreed to participate.
The study began with a 60-minute face-to-face baseline survey focused on respondent’s current intimate relationship, attitudes, and experiences related to intimate relationships and pregnancy. This was followed (for participants who agreed to participate in the longitudinal part of the study) by brief weekly online or telephone surveys to assess ongoing experiences.
Overall, 75% of participants participated in the study for at least 18 months. Participants received small payments for their participation and completion of weekly surveys. Study authors excluded women who did not have sex with male partners, as well as women whose relationships ended before the follow-up surveys began, making the final analyzed sample 895 women.
Results showed that 80% of participants’ relationships ended during the study period. 41% of relationships included fighting (but without intimate partner violence), and 28% of relationships included intimate partner violence. 52% of participants experienced intimate partner violence.
Participating women reported engaging in non-consensual non-monogamy (cheating) in 5% of relationships, while they reported their partner doing this in 7% of relationships. They reported engaging in ambiguous-consent non-monogamy in 9% of relationships, while reporting this for their partner in 16% of relationships.
They reported having sex during 42% of weeks in which they had a partner. On average, relationships lasted 9 months and 85% of them did not include pregnancies or births. 6% included a pregnancy that did not lead to a birth, and 8% of these relationships resulted in a child. Partners were, on average, 2 years older than respondents.
Participants were more likely to experience violence from their partner in the weeks when their partner was having another sexual partner, both in situations where this represented ambiguous-consent non-monogamy and when it was non-consensual non-monogamy (i.e., when the partner was cheating). Relationships were more likely to dissolve after both types of non-monogamy and after intimate partner violence.
The authors framed these findings using expectancy violations theory, which is the idea that people have strict standards for how their partners should behave, and breaking those rules triggers a severe reassessment of the relationship.
“Findings, interpreted through expectancy violations theory, suggest NCNM [non-consensual non-monogamy i.e., cheating on a partner in a monogamous relationship] and ACNM [ambiguous consent non-monogamy i.e., having additional sexual partners without an explicit agreement] function as powerful relational breaches, while physical IPV [intimate partner violence] (assault) may operate differently from chronic psychological IPV in predicting dissolution,” study authors concluded.
The study contributes to the scientific understanding of romantic relationships. However, although the study collected data on participants’ own non-monogamous behavior, the authors did not report the associations between these types of participants’ behavior and intimate partner violence. Therefore, it remains unreported whether participating women’s own non-monogamous behaviors were associated with intimate partner violence, or how often participants’ and their partners’ non-monogamous behaviors co-occurred. Additionally, the paper did not measure participant-perpetrated intimate partner violence in the same way it measured violence perpetrated by their partners, making the asymmetry starker.
The paper, “Intimate Partner Violence, Ambiguous and Non-Consensual Non-Monogamy, and Breaking Up During Young Adulthood,” was authored by Jennifer S. Barber and Yasamin Kusunoki.