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Home Exclusive Relationships and Sexual Health Attachment Styles

People who are high in attachment anxiety make more frequent social comparisons to their partner’s exes

by Beth Ellwood
April 22, 2020
in Attachment Styles, Social Psychology

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Individuals who are high in attachment anxiety make more frequent comparisons to relationships involving ex-partners, compared to those who are low in attachment anxiety. This finding comes from a study published in the Journal of Relationships Research.

While relationship research tends to view new relationships as independent from past ones, emerging evidence suggests this may not be the best approach. Studies continue to show that feelings about a past relationship can influence the way a person perceives their current relationship.

This new study aimed to explore how attachment styles might make people more or less susceptible to ruminating over past relationships. Specifically, they were interested in whether attachment style might influence social comparisons to two types of people: a current partner’s ex or an ex’s current partner.

A sample of 259 students currently in romantic relationships completed questionnaires that assessed their attachment style, relationship satisfaction, relationship uncertainty, and relationship social comparisons.

Participants were asked whether they or their current partner had been in a previous relationship of at least six months. Based on responses to these questions, subjects were split into two conditions. Depending on which group they were in, they were asked additional questions that prompted social comparisons and evaluations of either their current partner’s ex (CPE) or their ex’s current partner (ECP).

Example items were, ‘I compare the things that my partner does for me to the things my ex does for their current partner’ (ECP condition) and ‘I compare how happy I am in my relationship to how happy my partner was with his/her ex in their relationship’ (CPE condition).

Results showed that subjects who scored high in attachment anxiety made more frequent social comparisons and also rated themselves less positively than their CPE or ECP when compared to those with lower levels of attachment anxiety.The authors suggest that, “for individuals who are uncertain in their relationships, these specific targets may serve as a potential threat to their relationship”.

Those scoring high in attachment anxiety also experienced more relationship uncertainty than those who scored low in attachment anxiety. However, no relationship was found between attachment anxiety and relationship satisfaction. The authors state, “these findings suggest that although anxiously attached individuals may demonstrate some secure tendencies within the dyad (i.e., high relationship satisfaction), this may not be enough to surmount feelings of uncertainty within and outside of the dyadic context”.

Researchers suggest that these insights might be useful during counseling when a couple is confronting issues related to a previous partner. “By highlighting the biases at play in the anxiously attached individual to both the individual and their partner … this research might assuage relationship uncertainties”.

The study, “The Ex-Factor: Attachment Anxiety and Social Comparisons Across Romantic Relationships”, was authored by Simran Hingorani and Rebecca T. Pinkus.

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