A new study published in Scientific Reports has investigated how different types of playfulness in adults relate to their romantic attachment styles and experiences of jealousy. The researchers found that certain types of playfulness are linked to more secure attachment styles, while others are connected to different facets of jealousy. Interestingly, these relationships were largely consistent across both mixed-gender and same-gender couples.
While previous research had shown that playfulness is linked to relationship satisfaction and partner preferences, the specific connections between playfulness and key relationship dynamics like attachment styles and jealousy were not well understood. Attachment styles describe our inner models for how relationships work, influencing how we approach intimacy and closeness. Jealousy, on the other hand, reflects how we react to perceived threats to our romantic bonds. The researchers aimed to explore these connections in detail and, importantly, to see if these connections were the same for couples regardless of their gender composition.
“There is robust evidence that adult playfulness plays a role (no pun intended) for romantic relationships,” said study author Kay Brauer of Martin Luther University Halle. “Prior research has shown that playfulness is a strongly desired trait when people are asked about their ideal partner, playfulness is associated with relationship satisfaction in couples, and partners are similar in their playfulness—even in samples of middle- and older age.”
“In this study, we extended findings toward how people experience and behave in their relationships by examining inclinations to attachment styles (i.e., internal working models of relationships) and jealousy (i.e., perceptions and reactions to threats to one’s relationships) regarding playfulness. We are happy that this is the first study that simultaneously tests questions about playfulness in couples in samples containing mixed-gender and same-gender couples.
For their study, the researchers recruited two groups of couples. The first group consisted of 332 mixed-gender couples, and the second group was made up of 139 same-gender couples of women. The average age was around 28-29 years old in both samples. The mixed gender couples were together an average of about 7 years and the same gender couples for an average of about 3 years.
Each individual in the couple independently completed an online questionnaire, ensuring their responses were not influenced by their partner. The questionnaire included several established measures to assess playfulness, attachment styles, and romantic jealousy.
To measure playfulness, the researchers used a tool that breaks down playfulness into four distinct types: other-directed playfulness, lighthearted playfulness, intellectual playfulness, and whimsical playfulness. Other-directed playfulness describes using playfulness to connect with others and ease social situations. People high in this trait might use humor to defuse tension or playfully express affection. Lighthearted playfulness is about having a carefree approach to life, seeing the world as less serious and more like a game. Intellectual playfulness involves enjoying playing with ideas and concepts, often in a stimulating and curious way. Finally, whimsical playfulness is characterized by a love for the unusual and unconventional, enjoying being seen as a bit quirky or flamboyant.
To measure attachment styles, Brauer and his colleagues used a questionnaire that assesses two main dimensions of attachment: anxiety and avoidance. Attachment anxiety reflects worries about relationship stability and whether a partner will be responsive and reliable. Attachment avoidance describes a tendency to feel uncomfortable with closeness and intimacy, preferring to maintain independence and emotional distance.
Finally, to measure romantic jealousy, the study used a questionnaire that looks at three different types of jealousy: cognitive, emotional, and behavioral. Cognitive jealousy involves jealous thoughts and worries about potential threats to the relationship, like imagining a partner being interested in someone else. Emotional jealousy refers to the feelings experienced when perceiving a threat, such as feeling upset or angry. Behavioral jealousy involves actions taken as a result of jealousy, like checking a partner’s phone or questioning their whereabouts.
After collecting data from all participants, the researchers used a statistical technique designed for studying couples, called the Actor-Partner Interdependence Model. This approach allowed them to examine how an individual’s own playfulness (actor effect) and their partner’s playfulness (partner effect) related to their attachment styles and experiences of jealousy. They also tested whether these patterns were the same for men and women within mixed-gender couples, and between same-gender and mixed-gender couples.
The study’s findings revealed several interesting connections. First, when comparing same-gender and mixed-gender couples overall, there were very few notable differences. The only exception was that same-gender couples reported experiencing less emotional jealousy on average. This suggests that, for the most part, relationship dynamics related to playfulness, attachment, and jealousy are similar across different couple types.
Looking at the relationship between playfulness and attachment styles, Brauer and his colleagues found that individuals who scored higher in other-directed, lighthearted, and intellectual playfulness tended to report lower levels of attachment insecurity. Specifically, other-directed playfulness was linked to lower attachment avoidance, meaning those who use playfulness to connect with others were less likely to feel emotionally distant in their relationships. Lighthearted and intellectual playfulness were both associated with lower attachment anxiety, suggesting that individuals who are more carefree or intellectually playful tend to worry less about their relationship security.
Intriguingly, whimsical playfulness did not show a significant relationship with attachment styles. Importantly, these connections were primarily within the individual, meaning a person’s own playfulness was related to their own attachment style, but not necessarily to their partner’s attachment style.
Regarding jealousy, the researchers uncovered a more complex picture. All four types of playfulness were linked to lower emotional jealousy within individuals. This suggests that people who are generally more playful, regardless of the type of playfulness, tend to experience less intense negative emotions like anger or upset when faced with potential relationship threats.
However, whimsical playfulness showed a different pattern. Individuals high in Whimsical playfulness reported higher levels of both cognitive and behavioral jealousy. This suggests that while they might experience less emotional upset, they might be more prone to jealous thoughts and behaviors like suspicion or checking up on their partner.
Examining partner effects revealed further nuances. When one partner was high in lighthearted playfulness, their partner tended to report greater cognitive jealousy, indicating increased worries and suspicious thoughts about the relationship. Conversely, when one partner was high in whimsical playfulness, their partner reported experiencing lower emotional jealousy.
“Generally, our findings must be seen as fundamental research and is based on correlations,” Kay told PsyPost. “Hence, we cannot draw inferences about whether playfulness causally predicts jealousy and attachment or vice versa. Accordingly, it is too early to derive recommendations for everyday life.”
“However, from a broader perspective our findings extend the literature on playfulness in relationships by showing again that those higher in playfulness (especially those who use their playfulness in social relationships; e.g., by teasing their partner in a loving way) report less emotions of jealousy and being more open to share their thoughts and feelings with their partner. In short, our findings suggest that, with few exceptions, playfulness goes along with feeling secure in close relationships — irrespective of gender and sexual orientation.”
Looking ahead, the researchers suggest that future studies could explore how playfulness changes over the course of a relationship and how interventions designed to increase playfulness might impact relationship dynamics, including attachment security and jealousy.
“Our long-term goal is learning more about the role of playfulness in adults regarding all phases of close relationships, from finding a potential partner to maintaining stability in relationships,” Kay said. “We hope that our findings can contribute to approaches that might help people to experience well-being in their romantic life.”
The study, “Extending the study of playfulness in romantic life: Analyzing associations with attachment and jealousy in same-gender and opposite-gender couples,” was authored by Kay Brauer, Rebekka Sendatzki, and René T. Proyer.
